An Obsession With Dung

My little sister Genny is serving a mission in South Korea. She recently sent a book entitled "Who Pooed On My Head?" Here is her translation:

One day a little mole popped his head out of his hole to see if there was trouble. And just then, something very weird happened. (All of a sudden, a long brown squishy thing fell on the mole's head. Kerplunk! It looked just like a sausage.) "Aah! What's this? Who pooed on my head?" The mole cried. (But the near-sighted mole couldn't find a single thing.)

"Hey you! You pooed on my head, right?" The more asked the pigeon as it flew by. "Who me"... No it wasn't me!" The pigeon replied. "My poo looks like this." (Right then, liquid white poo fell and went splat, right in front of the mole's feet. The mole got white spots on his right leg.)

"Hey you! You pooed on my head , right?" The mole asked the horse as it was eating grass in the field."Who me? No, it wasn't me !" The giant horse replied. "My poo looks like this." (Right then, kadunk, 5 big burly horse poos fell in front of the mole. They were like dark-colored apples. It was truly amazing, spectacular)

"Hey you! You pooed on my head , right?" The mole asked the rabbit. "Who me? No, it wasn't me!" The rabbit answered back. "My poo looks like this."(And at that moment, tink tink tink, 15 rabbit poos that looked like dark-colored peas spouted at the mole. The mole yelled, "Oh crap!" and nimbly dodged the poo.)

"Hey you! You pooed on my head , right?" The mole asked the goat who looked like he had just woken up from a dream."Who me? No, it wasn't me !" The goat replied. "My poo looks like this." (Right then, plicket plunk and poo that looked like chocolate eggs tumbled down on top of the grass. This pleased the mole very much.)

"Hey you! You pooed on my head , right?" The mole asked the cow as it finished chewing it's cud. "Who me? No, it wasn't me !" The cow answered. "My poo looks like this."(Suddenly splurt, and a yellowish green colossal pile of cow poo fell right next to the mole as it gushed onto the grass. The mole rejoiced that the chap who pooed on his head was not the cow.)

"Hey you! You pooed on my head , right?" The mole asked the pig."Who me? No, it wasn't me !" The replied the pig. "My poo looks like this."(Right then a pasty poo pile went plop and fell on the grass. The mole plugged his nose.)

"Hey, you two pooed on my head ...." The mole intended to ask but did not as he got closer. He saw two flies sitting on two big pieces of poo, eating and getting very plump. "Finally I met some friends who can help me out." thought the mole to himself. "Hello, my boys, could you maybe tell me who pooed on my head?" The mole asked. "Hold your horses and say still." The two flies buzzed around, took a sniff of the poo on the mole 's head and said.... "Ah, this is the deed of none other than the DOG!"Finally the little mole found out who pooed on his head.

CHUBBY HANS! The butcher's dog.The mole quickly scrambled on to the top of Chubby Hans' doghouse. (A moment later, a little raisin-like poo went schwink and fell onto chubby Hans' broad forehead.) Only then could the little mole happily smile and vanish into the ground.